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Before we figure out if eloping can be a good thing, lets make sure we know exactly what "eloping" means. Traditionally, or back in the day, when a couple would elope, there was always secrecy involved, and a somewhat negative connotation. A couple might elope if there was a pregnancy, or if parents would not allow the marriage. Usually, it was a clandestine type of thing. 
But today, some couples say they're "eloping", but really mean that they're getting married without any guests present, even though they have told people about it beforehand. Others sometimes use the word just to indicate a quick courthouse wedding, regardless of whether there are guests there or not. So, we can see the meaning of the word is not quite what it was, and does not have such an air of secrecy about it.
So, why would a couple want to elope? The first good reason that might cause them to elope is potential family drama. No bride wants to feel stress or be worried about what craziness might blow up. Aunt June is known to start fights with Aunt Rebecca. Bride's brother James has just gotten a divorce from his wife, who is Bride's best friend. Her mother hates Groom's mother.
There are untold numbers of scenarios that we could all think up, but I think you get the point. Honestly, I do not blame any bride for wanting to avoid trouble on her wedding day. It might be easier to just slip away and get married with a handful of friends to cheer her on. "Let's avoid the drama and get married on an island".
Another reason to elope might be to save money. If parents cannot contribute, and bride and groom do not want to pay or cannot pay for a big wedding, the bride and groom might want to go off by themselves. Here is where it can get sticky, though.
As a mom, I would probably say it is never all right to elope, especially if it was my daughter! But, if I put myself in the bride's shoes, I have to admit; there are a few good reasons why a couple might choose this option.
So, when is not OK to elope? I really do understand that there are some situations that are so difficult to bear, that a wedding and reception would just not work for the couple. But, the balance here is that while the bride and groom want to avoid drama or pain, they need to make sure they are not causing more drama and pain.
I know of one groom that got so wrapped up in love, that he was convinced to have a spur of the moment wedding in another state. His family did not know about it until after it happened. I can tell you that his momma had a very hard time with this. It took years for that hurt to be healed.
So, think carefully before making a decision to elope, and if you as a couple, value your relationships with your family, I suggest that you at least talk over your ideas and feelings with them first.
They may not like it, but it is better to share your heart with them, than to exclude them altogether.
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